ode to oddities

What's good losers?

First thing's first, sorry for not updating as frequently as I mentioned I would. I just got caught up in college stuff and it was so hard to keep myself sane.

Since it is semester break and I have nothing on my hands, I decide to make the most of my time (which is just 2 weeks by the way since I have to go back to campus a week early for an event). I have started to pick up books again, and that joy of being immersed in your own world, I felt that again. I missed it.

The first book I picked up was Rainbow Rowell's Carry On.Since I have read 'Fangirl' a few years back, I was pleasantly surprised the author released a book detailing Simon and Baz.  Frankly speaking I wanted to get the book ages ago but I kept putting it off because I felt like I needed to save money. And I definitely regret that I did not pick up any sooner.

Just like other of Rainbow Rowell's books, the I absolutely love the characters and their perks. I found myself hating Penny,Agatha and Baz at first but then realised that I judged too fast. But I still lowkey hated what Agatha did to Simon. Baz is a hot f*cker by the way, there I said it.

I would rant on more but I assume that most of you hadn't read that book yet, so I don't want to spoil it in case you had the intention of reading it. There will also be a sequel to it coming out September 2019 (hopefully) and I'm already thinking about pre-ordering it.

Hello losers.
Only a month since my previous update? Frankly amused with myself that I'm still trying to keep this blog alive. I know that probably nobody keeps up with it until now though since I don't post on my social media accounts whenever there's an update. I won't mind if there isn't an audience to begin with. It would be as if I am writing a diary. If you cared enough you would visit here once every blue moon.

Early and mid January was okay. The end was a little bit shaky. Felt betrayed and left out but that's okay. Nothing new about that since I've been dealing with the same issue since school days. The only difference is that now I did not care as much as I did back then. If you want to leave me out, fine by me, I have nothing to lose either way. It was probably my own blunder to begin with, letting people in again without being cautious.

Well, sometimes a reminder is all it takes to keep building my walls up again.

To those who's had my back, thank you. Never in a million years would I thought that you would be the ones to hear my rants and help me get back up.

Exhausting and emotionally draining month.

Here's to February.

Cheers.
xo

Hello losers.
It has been awhile since my last update.

Initially, I planned to do an update on New Year's eve but I guess I just forgot. I just wanted to summarise how my year went and all that. It might be nothing to most of you but to me, a way to note what I should change for 2019.

Last year I pretty much hit rock bottom a couple of times. Had a few rough patches but I picked myself back up with the help of a couple people who has been my pillar of support when I was unable to get back on my two feet (Shout out to them! You know who you are :D ). Along the way, I have learned to let people go, knowing that the few I have now are enough to keep me happy. Selfish in a way, but after all I'm the one in charge of my own happiness. I learned to take it easy on myself, especially this semester because I realise the more I push myself (i.e. study all night with no sleep, worry non-stop, self-doubt), the worse I feel about who I am and that led to a very dark period of my life that I am somehow grateful for but I am  more willing for it to be forgotten. I understood that I should not be so selfless to the point I often got used and stepped on by people who I genuinely used to care for and that unfortunately caused my own destruction and to that I put my foot down and say, no more.

To be frank, my life has gotten a lot better once I started to take it easy on myself. I know my limits and I learned to respect them and not push too much and as a result, I'm proud to say it has been turning out good so far. Entering the final trimester of the 2018, I felt more fulfilled, free and happy. I promised myself that I would spend more time with my family during this semester break and I'm glad that I fulfilled my promise.

Some photos taken during this whole 3 weeks (No captions because I'm a sloth to think of one) :-

Hello. This is kind of quick for an update especially from me. I just figured it would be nice to write as much as I can while I still have the liberty to before my semester starts again.

I wanted so bad to write about my baby bitch Asra. Now you might be wondering who they are, okay so here goes.
Ever since my final exams ended, I've been wallowing and indulging in youtube videos and conspiracy theories, I've felt like I've lost a sense of purpose since all I have known for the past 3 months was a routine of going to class, studying, and bullshitting my way through things.  So I suddenly came across a game I've used to play a year ago; The Arcana. Simple enough, it's a choose your own path kind of game, and since I played it last it was only a few books in. Plus, I didn't have the phone space to keep it so I just uninstalled it.

Now since I've saved up and bought a new phone with plenty of space, I could finally get back to playing that game again. And OH BOY I did not regret it one bit.
I missed out on a LOT.

It took about 2 days for me to finish Asra's route, which is my favourite by far. I'm on my way to finish Nadia's route at the moment. I don't know when I will get to Julian's route but I'm in no hurry.

You might be wondering: why is she talking so much about Asra? It's just a game.
---Ok /inhales deeply/ listen. Asra is the cutest, most mysterious piece of shit of a character and I relate to them* so much, that is why I have kind of fallen in too deep for them. Props to the artist for such a lovely character design. The art style is so astounding too, I high key wished I could draw that good. You can read about them in the fan wiki HERE. Every detail describing them, I can relate to personally. I adore how they are secretive most times (if you play the game, you would know how very secretive Asra is and how much secrets are a huge trait to Asra's personality) but open up to the apprentice and just let their walls down. That to me makes me feel trusted and appreciated. Plus, how they are a free spirit at heart but also have someone to anchor them so they aren't astray for too long. In a way, you need to work your gears to really figure Asra's route and get a sense how much more meaningful and intricate their relationship is.
Let's not forget about Faust!!! Asra's familiar and my favourite noodle boi. I have gone soft for Faust and the :3 face.
One thing I really, really love is the story line. It's not one you see in the norm, to me at least. It's refreshing to experience something different that will widen your perspective.

Hi freaks.

I'm back.
Well that's not a nice way to address my readers. My apologies. I have been away for so long (a year perhaps) and frankly I thought I would be gone with the blogging world for good. But guess who's on here again back on their bullshit and typing their nonsensical rants. And you're all here to feast on it. How lovely.

I can't promise frequent updates, since I have been struggling with myself, my studies and my social life a lot lately. It's just that point in life where you have to filter in the things that will matter in the future. And the point of this blog is just to put out my thoughts, maybe some other random things like book reviews, photography, poems, drawings - well you get the picture. This place is- to put it bluntly- a dump for my creative work I guess. I do hope however you somehow, someway, enjoy the things I put up here, or at the very least, admire the effort I put into it when I could have been doing something else that is more productive.

More updates soon as I'm on my semester break. I have to use all the free time I have on my hands while time is still on my side. After that it's back to numbers,circuits and more headaches,stress crying and power napping.

xo